We leave in 2 days. I am nervous, excited and have butterflies that this trip, originally planned almost 2 years ago is coming to fruition. Am I ready? I don't know. People ask me why I am doing this, instead of taking a vacation, or just relaxing, and my answer is-- I don't know all of the reasons. I do know that I have always wanted to go on a pilgrimage, dedicated to the Lord, and opening my mind to all of the wonderful experiences I have lived and want to live in the future. I want to spend a good portion of my day in meditation and prayer, thanking God for all of the wonderment I have had throughout my life. I also want to make it a journey for myself, and not an easy one. I want to push myself physically, in order to open my mind up more spiritually. I know that Jesus will be walking with me every step of the way, and hopefully, he will help me be strong mentally, as well as physically and emotionally to accomplish this goal-dedicated to him.
I have been so blessed in my lifetime. I had wonderful parents, who nurtured me and encouraged me throughout my life. I have siblings, who I know that if I needed them, would be there for me. My children have been the heart of my life and if not for them, I would consider my life empty. They have brought me untold amounts of joy since they were born. I love them completely, and unconditionally, and without their love, I would never be in the mental place I am today. I have been wonderfully blessed with their spouses- who also have been so loving to me, and who I have come to love as my own.
I have 5 grandchildren. A true blessing at my age of 57. I am so glad that I am young enough to enjoy playing with them and spending time with them. I anticipate many, many fun times with them in the future.
And then there is John. We met only 4 years ago, and some days it seems like yesterday, and some days, it feels like forever that we have been together. He is loving, kind, and supportive of all of the things I want to do with my life- like going to Spain and leaving home for 7 weeks. He has never, ever implied that I shouldn't go and do this. I am so fortunate, and blessed that he is coming with me for the first 10 days, to help me find the beginning of this walk and encourage and pull me up that mountain on that first day.
Which brings me back to "Why am I doing this?" I'm going to for myself, to look at this wonderful world we live in and come home thinking about what I want or need to do with the rest of this blessed life I've had. Maybe changed, or maybe not changed at all. Don't know. I think the key is to have little expectations, and be open to everything that will happen. I'm just gonna walk, and walk, and walk til I can't anymore.
